Good bye...

Site has moved. It was fun while it lasted Blogspot!

UPDATES

Ok so I know I haven't been blogging as much as I'd like to but hey, no one's perfect. Just wanna let you all that I've been tinkering with iWeb on my Mac so I can get a new site up for the blog. Keeps your eyes peeled!

Cheerio

Mike

Ok, so you guys might actually be racists

**Before I start I would just like to say that I'm all for racial equality.

I just wanna go back to the topic of Obama tonight, but before I continue, watch this video I stumbled upon on the interwebs,

Right, so I hinted the last time that there might be some racial issue with regards to the Conservative attacks on Obama. After watching the video, I can't help but think that such conservative news personalities such as Glenn Beck (ESPECIALLY GLENN BECK) can't handle the fact that a non-white person is in power at the white house.

Just look at the folks talking in the vid:

- Rush Limbaugh (White)

- Lou Dobbs (White)

- Glenn Beck (White)

- Sean Hannity (White..see a pattern)

Like really, we don't need this shit, why "can't we all just get along" for fucks sake? If you guys keep this crap up, we might as well expect a civil war to break out in the near future. But we can only hope it never comes to that.

But then again this is just my theory on this, I'm not saying my theory is absolute. I mean hey most of these guys are from Fox news and we all know how much crap they've been picking out of their asses lately. Perhaps they're just doing it for the ratings, I mean controversies have always proven to increase the number of viewers. But you must be VERY desperate to even play the race card on national television, but it would certainly explain why the whole Obama birth certificate is still being brought up today.

Anywho I'm doneskies for the night and I'm slightly pleased at the fact that this entry was a little more coherent than the last.

Good night!

Mike

I think you're all just a bunch of sore losers (and possible racists)

Fox News (most notably Glenn Beck and Bill O'Reilly), when will you guys just accept the fact that an African American is President? Like seriously this whole "Obama's Birth Certificate" fiasco is getting a little out of hand. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, I'm referring to the Republicans bitching and moaning about how Obama is not an American citizen. But recently, Obama indeed proved he is indeed a US citizen. But wait, although the Repubs have been severely owned, they start picking at the fact that Obama won't release a birth certificate to the public.

C'mon guys. Seriously?

I was watching The Young Turks on Youtube and they brought up the idea that maybe there's a racial component to all of this (there is no denying it). Like they mentioned the fact that Bill Clinton (who is white) and Joe Biden (who happens to be white as well) were never asked to show they're birth certificates. But now that Obama is in office, the Conservatives want to see some solid proof (or Obama's head on a pike).

It just angers me that the Conservatives are acting like a bunch of crazed ass-hats, constantly trying to sway the public into opposing Obama. I mean, no wonder the fucking world hates the US. With this kind of behavior (on national television) nobody can take your country seriously anymore.

But then again, the Repubs could be bitching about everything due to the fact that they're the opposition and that's what the opposition does, just call out their opposition's actions and hope to God they can get a rise out of the public. That's what they do and it doesn't irk me as much.

AUGH, ok I honestly can't think straight. So with that in mind, I just thought I'd point this out to y'all, was going for something more ranty and BETTER, but I've been feeling rather lousy today, so this semi-coherent pseudo-rant is the best I can do right now.

Cheers

Mike

It's weird how TV can mirror our lives sometimes

Because I honestly feel like Steve Urkel. Geeky guy with the glasses that isn't exactly loved by everyone, you know...always trying to win the heart of Laura Winslow (which always results in failure, until the final season of course)

I'm sorry but one more thing

...you guys have NO sense of humor whatsoever. Seriously, before you guys actually started going to church, you were FUN. Now you're just dead inside.

That is all.

Now you're treading on thin ice...

Ok so apparently you were really close to burning my own book collection, that I've spent A LOT of time on completing (not to mention the money that went into this thing) because I'm apparently slipping away into the dark side...

WOW.

I honestly thought you guys couldn't get THIS CLOSED-MINDED, but you honestly never cease to disappoint.

So really, hats of to you guys...

Cheers

Mike

And this is what our taxpayer money is going towards!!

PETA, PETA, PETA...

http://www.peta.org/cooking-mama/index.asp?c=pcmgb08

I just want to send out a pleasant little "fuck you" to PETA. Honestly, you guys and gals are the most ignorant and hypocritical creatures I have the misfortune of sharing the same air with. Like I honestly hope that a bear eats you sorry fuckers alive, because:

1. The world won't have to put up with your crazy shenanigans anymore

2. It would be one wicked case of irony. 

So all in all fuck you.

From your resident meatatarian

-Mike 

GOOD BYE UofA...

...Hello wherever the hell Emma is goin!

I'm a bit skeptical but who knows...

http://www.wordofmouthexperiment.com/dedpyhto/tests/tibetian/index.htm

Give it a shot, let me know what you thought of it

I. Want. This.

I am absolutely sold on this game. When the game actually popped out Cthulu out of nowhere I went bananas. Cannot wait till this game is released. 

Cheers

Mike

PS. Once I get my hands on that game, I'm gonna match up Ghandi vs. Chuck Norris. I mean for Pete's sake, they managed to get God (with a shotgun mind you) to take on Cthulu so pretty much ANYTHING can happen. 

PS

Fuck you dad.

What happened to you?

You know, over the past few months I've watched you guys change. The Sunday church services, the weekly Bible studies, the weekly prayer meetings...I just wanted to say that I miss my dad. 

I miss listening to K-Rock when we work in the garage or even during car rides home. Remember when I bought you Pink Floyd's The Wall? I think you didn't even give a shit when I bought you it. I got you that album because I thought you would like it, seeing as though you used to love Pink Floyd. Now you won't even bother touching it let alone listen to it. Like fucking hell man, nowadays whenever I tune it to 97.3 you always go "What is that? Change that station." and force me to switch it to that Christian rock station. 

Back then you were a cool guy, someone I would look up to sometimes and go, "Wow you are the coolest dad I know." But now I don't know what to think of you. 

From, 

Mike

Motion controls and interactivity: It's either tits or GTFO

I'm just gonna be upfront with you guys and say that I think that Microsoft's Project Natal and Sony's Magic Wand are the dumbest things that have come out of the gaming industry in a while. With that out of the way, lets start off by tearing a new one out of Ninetendo.

A few years back when Nintendo first introduced the Wii we all went "oo" and "ahh" about it all because we haven't seen anything like it. But as time passed the novelty of the Wii's motion controls have begun to wear off and it was evident with all of the party games it's been getting lately. And judging by the Wii's '08 and '09 E3 runs, I have a feeling the Wii is going downhill. Sure it's not a console that's solely directed at hardcore gamers, but c'mon even casual gamers deserve good games. Wii Music seemed to be a huge failure (seeing as though Red Octane and Harmonix seemed to have the rhythm based game industry down to a science), the Wii Motion Plus (which helps improve the motion controls of the Wiimote) isn't going to be a success if it isn't supported by good games, and can someone honestly tell me what the fuck is up with that new Wii Vitality Sensor?(For fucks sakes Nintendo, people everywhere have been waiting for you guys to come out with a new Zelda title or something to make up for a shitty press conference last year, but no you guys bust open the doors at this years E3 to fuck us over with a vitality sensor. Tell me, what is the purpose of this peripheral?? You couldn't even answer that question at YOUR OWN PRESS CONFERENCE. Gah you know you really screwed the pooch when you don't even know what your own piece of hardware is for. *sigh*)

You're probably asking yourself, "Why are you hating on the Wii, Natal, and the Sony wand thing?" Well because I have a feeling that motion controls are gonna kill the gaming industry. Lets be honest people, Microsoft and Sony are coming out with new motion control peripherals because they finally discovered how much cash is in motion controls, I mean just look at the Wii. So all in all, they're just in it for the money. So let me move onto Sony for a bit...

When Sony introduced it's sixaxis controller, some of thought immediately thought that Sony was just trying to compete with the Wii. And after a few failed attempts at motion controlled game (I'm looking at your Lair, ugh what a cluster fuck of a game) I think Sony kinda realized what a shitty job the motion controls for the sixaxis has been doing, so developers have begun to utilize the motion controls for tiny mini-games (a good example of this is in Killzone 2 where you actually have to turn your controller to set C4 and stuff like that). Then out of nowhere during the Sony press conference, they revive the Eyetoy of all things and slap on a Wiimote clone (Seriously guys it looks just like the Wiimote, except it's bigger, it's back, and has a stupid ball at the end to make yourself look like a complete ass when you wave it around). Really Sony? Man compared to this, I would rather have you revive the boomerang-controller thing you guys trashed before your came up with the sixaxis controller. 

Oh and Microsoft don't think I haven't forgotten about you...

I'll admit I was kinda intrigued when you first showed us Project Natal, thinking that it had "Minority Report" feel to it. But looking at it now, I feel angry. Like honestly, you got Peter Molyneux to help you hype this thing up (Strike one Microsoft) and we all know everything Petey hypes turns out to be a total disappointment (Just look at the Fable series). Just when you thought you looked retarded playing certain games on the Wii, Project Natal will make you look like a total twat seeing as though they give you the luxury of controlling a game with your body and you'll still be flailing your limbs everywhere. 

But you're probably wondering, "Mike, what the hell are you getting at?" Well what I was trying get at is this whole idea of motion control that is flooding the gaming industry. All of the big named console industries are trying to develop new ways to get our bodies into motion, adding this whole level of interactivity for our games. But the thing is, I've always thought video games were a thing where we could just sit back on our asses and play games with a controller in hand? Sure, making us move our bodies would make us more active, but seriously, making us move when we play would become such a chore after a while. And the great thing about hand held controllers is that we could do so many things with the push of a button and still have a ton of fun. 

I just fear with all of this hype over motion controls and the quality of games will decrease, screwing over gamers such as myself. But even I'm against the idea of Project Natal and what not, I hope that I'm proven wrong, these innovations truly have huge potential, and all I ask is that they don't fuck up. 

Cheers

Mike

My bad guys

Yeah sorry if I've been totally leaving you guys in the dust on my blog, I've just been SUPER busy with my jobs. It's just been really hectic lately seeing as though I'll be working everyday of the week. But don't fret I will try to update it whenever I can and will definitely assure you that each post will absolutely BLOW YOUR MIND 

Over and out

Mike

E3 Coverage Part 1

After watching all of the press conferences, watching trailers, and demos at E3 here's what I think so far: 

- Microsoft and Sony had the best press conferences at E3

- The Nintendo PC was mediocre

- EA PC was ok although I am stoked about all of the Bioware stuff they showed us 

- Ubisoft was a SNOOZER, good lord I never knew I could hate James Cameron this much because he just went on and on and on and on about Avatar without showing us JACK ALL

- Splinter Cell Conviction looked different than from what I expected about a year ago. but overall I'm very excited to see more of it

- Assassin's Creed 2 looked AMAZING. Very different from the first game. The demo was just intense now that you can take other people's weapons, wield two of those hidden blades, and from the looks of it new ways to take out guards and other bystanders 

- MAG really surprised me this year. 256 player multiplayer just blew my mind

- Brutal Legend hasn't really caught my attention yet, but it looks OK at the most

- Left 4 Dead 2 was announced this time with more characters, campaigns, a hint at a possible story line, and improvements to the AI director. All in all VERY STOKED for this

- Metal Gear Solid Rising really surprised me due to the fact that A) it's a 360 exclusive and B) it's starring Raiden this time around. But something tells me that this isn't gonna be your typical sneaking around kind of game...

- God of War 3 I am excited for like in good ol' God of War style it looks seriously epic so I hope to see more of this soon. (UPADATE: I just saw Kratos rip of a mans head HOLY BALLS)

- Metroid Other M was one of the few games that made me jump for joy. Like having Team Ninja (The team behind the Ninja Gaiden series) helping out with development on is just amazing. Judging from the trailer this will be a 3rd person adventure game with some 1st person throw into the mix. The trailer didn't really give away a lot but it sure wet my appetite

- Super Mario Galaxy 2 was a nice little treat because you get to finally use Yoshi 

- Project Natal from Microsoft looked very interesting, the fact you don't need a controller anymore really caught my eye. It really had a "Minority Report" feel to it all but I was impressed. Cannot wait to see more

- A new motion sensing controller for the PS3 was announce...all I'll say is that it looks a lot like the Wiimote...

- Halo ODST was a wee bit underwhelming for me. Like I feel like they haven't show enough yet but I'm sure as someone shows some gameplay footage I'll get a better understanding of it 

- Halo Reach on the other hand got me very excited. Prequel to the Halo series, so I expect a lot more Spartans this time around 

Look for Part 2 Tomorrow

Late Night Ramblings

I still don't get why people of other religions can't respect other religions. Honestly people if you think about, if you were to strip each religion down to it's core values, wouldn't you get the same thing just in different words? 

...I thought so.

Life Without A Functional Right Hand: Prologue

As much as it pains me to type this (literally) I feel as though I need to let the word out: 

"Never take your dominant hand for granted"

Susan Boyle: You're A Good Singer...So what?

Well looks like Youtubers everwhere once again have Susan Boyle fever. If you don't know who she is, she's a talented singer, who's not much of a looker might I add, that appeared on "Britain's Got Talent" and she surpassed everyone's expectations by totally belting out a fine tune. Ok cool so she's practically an underdog correct? Yeah I would say so. 

But soon after people everywhere started to go nuts over this lady. Youtuber's, news stations, and people everywhere were talking about this woman and her performance on Britain's Got Talent. I'll admit she can belt a fine tune but I never got why everyone is just so hyped up about it? Like sure she's pretty old and not exactly what you would call attractive, but that's the thing. I just think people are just amazed by the fact she's old and can belt out a fine tune. Pretty sure there's a lot of other people out there just like her. 

Though I can see why people can see her as an inspiration, she's one that doesn't quit on her dreams. I can respect that. But seriously her antics are getting a little old. 

Just a few days ago, the semi-finals on "Britain's Got Talent" was televised and Susan managed to outplay the competition and make it to the final (may need confirmation on that one, but nonetheless gave a stellar performance). After the show people everywhere started going ga ga once again over her performance. 

Quite, frankly I'm getting kinda sick of the publicity this woman is getting. Singer, Lily Allen even remarked "Susan Boyle is so overrated" and I agree there isn't really anything special with this woman. She can belt a fine tune, but that's it. We see this shit all of the time on American Idol, so what the hell is the big deal? 

And from the looks of it, Susan herself is getting quite sick of the fame she's been receiving. Apparently she snapped after getting into a conversation with a pair of journalists from the british tabloid, "The Sun". She honestly looks like a nice person, but seeing her crumble under the pressures of the media is just sad. And like look at her now, they've over hyped her to the point where she's just another singer that television has plucked society. 

Why didn't I say this?

 It's about 12am and for some reason all of the things I should've said that night just came to me. I have to admit I was a nervous git that night and when I get nervous I lose focus and my mind just goes everywhere; especially that night. That night I was definitely all over the place. 

But I might as well just get to what I was supposed to say that night in a more coherent tone. I am just absolutely head over heels for you, I don't know how else to put it. There is no better to spend my time than to just sit down and talk to you, that's the truth. Honestly, before you left I was debating whether or not to tell you this and I didn't. And it hurt. Let me tell ya, trying to think about the "what if's" isn't the best thing in the world. Now that you're here I can't hold these feelings back. Maybe I'm saying this because I'm afraid of being disconnected from you once again, but what I do know is that I'm saying this because I can't stand not being able to let you know how I feel about you. I'm crazy about you and there's just no one else I would rather be with at the moment...

Why am I saying this and on my blog of all things? I would tell you personally but you're gone now, doubt you would answer a text of this kind, and I don't know if you would even answer a call from me. But I think I've mentioned my blog to you once already and a very small part of me thinks you'll stumble upon this some time soon. But what are the chances you would? What is distance anyway? I don't care that you're over half a country away, just hearing your voice is like having you here in person...I just hope you'll be able to read this. And if you don't well at least I tried 

Yours Truly, 

Mike

My kind of drug

The more I think about it, I'm starting to realize that I've developed a full blown music addiction. Like every time pop on my earbuds and turn on the iPod, I get this "high" that just takes me to this other place...away from all the shit in this world...a place where there's only me and I'm left alone to just wander aimlessly while I lose myself in the melodies and rhythms of the song that's playing. 

It's practically a drug for me. Everyday I'm in need of a "fix" and if I don't get that "fix" I go through this withdrawal and try to search for an alternate way to play some music at comfortable volume. It's that important to me. The sound of music has become so integral to me life nowadays. I listen to it when I'm happy, sad, angry, when I just wanna day dream, when I just wanna forget about something, when I'm trying to get over someone, when I want to remember someone, or when I just need something to tune out all of the bullshit that happens to me. 

Music is always there for me when there isn't anybody around. The sound of Metric keeps me mellow, Coldplay is always there to help me get back up on my feet, a little bit of DMX keeps me going when I work out, and the list goes on. 

Knowing that I have an addiction to this may sound unsettling, but look at it this way. I'm not exactly snorting cocaine here. Not hurting anyone else, not stealing any cash to buy more music. I just need to listen to what I've got and that would just be good enough for me. If anything, it's helping me. It helps me bring me back into focus whenever I lose it or am feeling downright shitty. 

For all of this, I would just like to end off by saying, don't shoot up heroine or smoke a cigarette, instead pop in some earbuds and let the music take you away...

(Just a little note, I do indeed have a volume lock on my iPod, this is mainly due to the fact that my hold button popped off and having the volume lock prevents me from accidentally putting the volume to max whilst I'm on the go)

Japan = Awesome

UGH FAIL

Well seeing as though I was a little too preoccupied with the awesomeness that is the new Star Trek Movie, I totally forgot to make a haiku for day 15 totally ending off the whole 365 haikus for me. 

Yeah I know shame on me seeing as though I kinda came up with it. But oh well I had a fun time. 

Updates: Seeing as though things are going at a quick pace for me, I'll be blogging every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday from here on end. This is so you guys can keep up with yours truly. 

Cheers

Mike

351 Haikus Day 15

A man on the bench

Thoughts are running through his head

There is a storm a brewin

352 Haikus Day 14

Of all the people

In the entire city 

I run into you

353 Haikus Day 13

It's been a long day

Can't stop thinking about you

I need to see you 

354 Haikus Day 12

When will I find her

I'm not doing nothing right

I'm sick of waiting

355 Haikus Day 11

Happy Mothers Day

To all other moms out there 

I'll see you later

356 Haikus Day 10

PC is a mess

Can't find nothing in the store

Self check-outs suck ass

357 Haikus Day 9

Nailed the interview

Let's hope I can get a job

Hope for employment

Hannity...We Meet Again

You started to call Kim Kardashian a "Good Role Model For Girls", that's strike one. 

Now you're criticizing Obama for wanting dijon mustard on his burger? Buddy that's strike two. 

One more strike and I'm legally obligated to kick your ass. 

Ok for those of you who don't know who I'm talking about, let me fill you in. I'm talking about Fox News Conservative Political Commentator Sean Hannity. Enough said. Seriously, I don't even need to mention the crap that this guy, let alone Fox News, pumps out. It hurts just mentioning his name, which blows because I'm gonna take a few shots at the guy in this post. So to make typing this post more bearable, we'll call him Hammity for the retarded pig he is. 

Right-o, here's the story: 

So Obama goes to this well known diner, orders a burger, and asks for no ketchup but for mustard insterad, but prefers something with a little kick like dijon. Obviously Hammity hears this and (I use this term lightly) "tries" to tear Obama a new one. 

What Hammity was trying to convey to the viewer was that Obama is not a man of the people because he wants something fancy on his burger, like dijon. Wow. 

For fucks sake Hammity, grow a pair (because it's quite evident you have none) and give us some good journalism  for once. I would rather hear you guys at Fox taking shots at his politics rather than his diet. Because seriously not only are you feeding us bullshit, but you're wasting air time as well. 

With "news" like this, it hurts to honestly take Fox seriously now. It's like they've honestly run out of things to criticize about Obama. What's next? Criticizing his attire? Oh wait they've already done that. FAIL

Ah man with news like this, no wonder everyone hates you. So to all of the boys and girls at Fox News (this includes you Hammity)...Get your heads out of each others asses and start reporting REAL news. God, rather watch The Onion, at least they know what they're talking about. 

Fishing

Some words of wisdom from a fellow fisher...woman: 

"You know the good fish aren't in shallow water" 

- Katie

Guess I should get my ass off the dock eh? 

358 Haikus Day 8

Circling the drain

Pockets are feeling lighter

You have let me down

Guess this is it my old friend

Dear Scrubs,

Before you leave tonight I just wanted to say, you were one of the greatest shows to ever grace our television sets. You were funny, emotional, and often times serious whenever you would pop on for that solid half hour every week. 

I'm definitely gonna miss you old friend. Day dreaming, EAGLES!, references to JD and Turks secret love for one another, the many times people referred to Elliot as that "girl from Connecticut",  Carla in general, Janitor and the Braintrust, Ted and Gooch, Mickhead, Dr. Vicksack, Dr. Cox and his cynical attitude, Jordan, Dr. Kelso, "Guy Love", "Everything Comes Down to Poo", Mrs. Wilk, Giftshop Girl, Minnie McSkinny, Hiedi Horseface, Rumple Fugly, Sean's ability to talk to animals, The Worthless Peons, Julie, Kim, the many times you would hear the trumpets play in jubilation every time the words "Sex buddies" was heard, Rowdy, Laverne and her "twin", "Wiener Cousins", and SO MUCH MORE will be missed. 

It's like having a piece of your being ripped out. I don't know what will fill the void..."Two and a Half Men"? Fuck no, they got nothing on you guys. 

So yeah, I'm gonna miss you Scrubs. You were always there to cheer me right up...until Season 7 that is...but then you totally made up for it in Season 8! *Sigh* It was fun while it lasted. 

Cheers

Mike

Fucking Pique

I gotta say that match between Chelsea and Barcelona was fucking close. Like hot damn that goal made by Bara in the the closing minutes was a heartbreaker. But what I will comment on is the reffing during the game. Shit son there were some really bad calls and so many penalties the ref should've called bullshit on during that match. Like holy God man, pay attention to the fucking game for once. It was crystal clear that Pique committed a hand ball in the second half (which would've helped Chelsea seal the deal) but no, the referee was too busy deciding whether or not giving Abidal was a good idea. 

...Fucking pique

359 Haikus Day 7

Watched the match today

Referee was retarded 

God damn you Pique

360 Haikus Day 6

It is Metric day

"Beatles or the Rolling Stones?"

I love their music

Yeah screw it

Due to increased spam, the voices section had to taken down until I find a better chat box. Sorry (?) for the inconvenience. 

-Mike

Let you voice be heard...in real time!

If look to your right ----> 

you will notice that there's this section called "Voices". This section is the new chat box in put up on the site to make commenting a lot easier for you guys. Chances are you'll probably get a response from me a lot faster! YAY!!

Cheers

Mike

361 Haikus Day 5

Iron crotch kung fu

I am gonna hurt myself

It will be worth it

362 Haikus Day 4

Went to audition

Forgot to bring my headshot

I think I did well

Parents Just Don't Understand

No I'm not gonna sing Will Smith's hit from back in the day. This goes out to my parents, so Mom, Dad, please listen. 

Ok I totally get that you're all gung-ho about Christianity nowadays. Now don't get me wrong I'm totally cool with that, whatever floats your boat. Just please stop trying to get me involved. Me and religion don't exactly go well together. It's like having have a PETA representative and a Butcher in the same room, it's just not a good combination. I've always thought of our house as a place of free thought and freedom (to an extent ofcourse) and I liked it like that.

But now it's like "Christianity or Bust" and I feel seriously uncomfortable. Honestly, I'd like to believe that there is a God, I'm a skeptic and I need solid evidence before taking that plunge. I don't really need anybody else to help me find the big man upstairs (I just have to look up don't I?) 

Just let me figure this thing out for myself, that way it would definitely make me feel more at ease than having you guys force this thing on me. 

Are we clear?

Cheers

Mike

363 Haikus Day 3

Parents don't approve

I don't even have a ride

Audition no more

364 Haikus Day 2

Audition in two

Parent's are not too thrilled

Oh well, whatever

Thank you Slumdog Millionaire

After watching Slumdog Millionaire (one of the best movies I've seen this year), I have to urge to watch bollywood movies. I don't know why, but honestly those films look good as in I will actually have fun watching it. So I just wanna say, thank you Slumdog Millionaire. 

Cheers

Mike

365 Haikus Day 1

Where did the snow go?

I want to rock out in shorts

So I can "wow" you. 

TTYN Paris

Ok, I'm gonna to talk about something other than swine flu, seeing as though the fear mongering news broadcasts have already done a good job of that. But instead I'm talk to you guys about the show "Paris Hilton's British Best Friend". 

Yes you heard me right, I  was actually bored enough to go ahead and venture with Paris for her quest to find a friend. Yeah, honestly there's not a lot to say about this show. It's almost like the Bachelor, where contestants go through various challenges to gain Paris' trust. 

First off, you know you have serious issues when you have to turn to reality television to find a friend. Second, it's reality television, so I can almost guarantee you that the show is 90% fake. Lastly, if this show is fake, the least you could ever do is make it seem real, like honestly Paris cannot act to save her life. A perfect example of this was when Paris has to chose which contestant had to go home. Like everyone is balling their eyes out because they're gonna have to say good-bye one of their friends, which seemed believable...to an extent of coarse. But when the camera zooms in on Paris' face, all she could muster is a line (that's supposed to filled with raw emotion) that sounded so lifeless and dead (like Paris' acting career BA ZING) it make me laugh soo hard it left me in stitches.

Let's be honest here Paris, the contestants don't really want to be your friend, they're all in it so they can get their 15 mins of fame. I could probably bet you some of the really obnoxious and flamboyant contestants already have their own reality tv show by now. 

*Sigh* Can't imagine where Paris will go to next to search for a friend: Paris (it would be fitting), Mexico (Do the world a favor and go to Mexico...like now), maybe Russia? Who knows. 

Mike

Yay for kids meals

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rm6d2oy8GRk

Is it just me or does the Burger King mascot look like a serial killer in the making?

Are porn stars the new role models?

According Fox's Conservative commentator, Sean Hannity, Kim Kardashian, star of the show "Keeping Up With The Kardashians", is considered to be a perfect role model for girls. 

...You hear that ladies and gentlemen? That's the sound of every single dooms day alarm in the world. Seriously? Just when I was about to consider Fox News as a credible news broadcaster (HA only kidding), they go out and pull a stunt like this. Calling Kim Kardashian a good role model is like kicking a 3 legged cat onto the highway, where it is run over by a tanker, which blows up right in front of your eyes; because in the end everyone around is gonna say "What the fuck dude." 

I guess it slipped Mr. Hannity's mind that Kim actually had a sex tape floating around on the interwebs (with Ray J of all people) and he seemed almost surprised by the fact that Kim posed nude for Playboy a while back.

But here's the kicker, Hannity claims that Kim is a role model based on the fact that she doesn't booze up like Britney Spears or Lindsay Lohan. Wow, so does this mean having I can fornicate with any woman I want and still be considered for sainthood, so long as I don't get plastered at Vinyl? 

Good lord, this just goes to show how bias (I'll explain this some other time...damn you Bill O'Reilly), misinformed, and BS ridden Fox News is. So here's a pleasant little "fuck you" to Fox News, because honestly, you guys claim to broadcast "news" but all I'm hearing is incoherent bullshit. 

Mike

Some striking new revelations

-The Mexican zombies are coming

-The old school James Bond films are so bad ass...like DAMN 

-MGS4 is fucking epic, though it pains me to say that

And lastly...

-I am absolutely head over heels for you 

Now onto to building my class schedule for next year FML

-Mike

This is for all of the ladies out there

- We think you ladies are complicated

- If you stop talking to us for a certain amount of time, we go into panic mode. 

- some of you ladies do this to "test" us or to simply see if we're actually interested in you.

But I speak for every guy out there when I say "Please stop this" because it confuses the hell

out of us.

- It's always good to be upfront sometimes, that way we don't have to keep guessing 

- It would be great if we didn't always have to make the first move. Honestly some of us go crazy (in a good way) when you gals make the first move

The Pig Sickness

Take your paws off me you damn dirty pigs!

So yeah this whole swine flu thing is getting a little out of control. For fucks sakes people you're supposed to treat this thing as if it were a regular flu. Wash your hands and don't come into contact with anyone who's infected, oh and DON'T LEAVE YOUR HOUSE. I swear, if you do leave...*breathes*....lets just say that dying from the flu won't be your biggest concern. 

The zombie apocalypse is nigh!

Let's be serious, news about this whole swine flu is just a cover up for the zombie apocalypse. That's right, the zombie-mother-fucking-apocalypse. I mean the government just invented this whole swine flu story to help keep the global community calm and for good reason too, the last thing we need is mass panic on a global scale. 

Here's the situation so far: 

- From the looks of it, it all originated in Mexico (Note to self, stay away from Taco Bell)

- Several cases of "swine flu" are beginning to show up in the US (Obviously the border patrol has failed us all)

- "Swine flu" has already spread to Europe (Now we have to worry about the French zombies) 

  - As a side note: if the infection spreads to India and/or China, we are absolutely screwed 

Don't panic just yet, it seems the infection is in it's early stages and from the looks of it, it can be contained and eradicated. But then again there is the odd chance that news of this will break out and everyone that hears about it will suddenly put their "Zombie Apocalypse Plan" into action, possibly resulting in mass hysteria and looting on a world wide scale. 

I myself have a Zombie Plan: 

- Steal the SUV (My parents won't exactly care seeing as though this will go down during the summer AND I'll be alone at home when the dead rise) 

- Tell family and friends to meet me at the army garrison 

- On my way to the garrison, I loot various grocery stores and gas stations for supplies

- When I meet up with everyone at the garrison, we (politely) ask the soldiers there for weapons 

- Head north to either Alaska or Yukon

- Wait till things die down for a bit, then join the Zombie Resistance and become a Zombie hunter

Honestly, I kinda wish we're just dealing with actual swine flu rather than have the Zombie Apocalypse rain down upon us. But then again what better way to pass the time than to put a gun to the zombified head of your former boss who would rather have a smoke for God knows how long than to help you wash the dishes, resulting in you staying 30 mins after the store closes. *breathe in* *breathe out*

Fuck it, bring on the Zombies *Loads imaginary shotgun* 

Aftermath

You know, it feels so weird finishing school this early. I'm not taking any spring classes so I've pretty much got this 4 month long summer vacation, which is pretty wicked mind you but you know its feels kinda overwhelming with the amount of free time I'm given. I'm definitely gonna work my ass off (once I get a job) and definitely stoked to work on this play Zvon and I are gonna pen and not to mention the fact I'm gonna part hardy most of the time. But still, a part of me misses the 2 month summer vacations, I guess it's because I feel, I dunno, busier you know. Having to balance school and other activities has allowed me to feel more in line and less slacked. I dunno maybe it's just me 

Milking the musical cash cow

When Activision's Guitar Hero to the market, gamers and critics went nuts over how fresh, innovative, and how awesome the game was. Then came along Guitar Hero 2, which I thought was the best of the series, and blew everyones minds. Years later, EA stepped into the world of rhythm games with Rock Band and people once again went totally bananas over how innovative and fun it is. Then the sequels came along. 

One thing that kinda irks me when it comes to the gaming industry, besides the numerous amounts of sports games (I'm looking at you Madden), is the fact that big name gaming industries always try to milk their beloved titles for what it's worth and as a result the quality of the game suffers. Prime examples include, the Lego series (OK honestly you guys should've stopped at Lego Starwars, because after that every other game is pretty much the same shit just with a different franchise) and aforementioned rhythm games like Rock Band and its sequel, Rock Band 2(the playlists nowadays suck ass). And it was only a matter of time before these two big name titles collided to create, Lego Rock Band. 

Ok guys w t fuck. Words cannot even fathom how pissed I am. 

GAH 

-Mike

I am a volcano and you are the small village right beside me...

"If your sister was in your position, we wouldn't have a problem because she's a girl" 

"Drama is useless"

I was speechless. Never in my entire life would I thought to have hated you guys this much. But here I am pissed as shit. And now that you guys angered the bull you're gonna get the horns. Once I'm done in Uni, I'm gonna leave and never come back and then actually make a name for myself. So enjoy your victory while it lasts, because I'm gonna make it my goal in life to see that I get the last laugh. 

Yours truly

Your son